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Getting Rid of the Angers 
we have stuffed inside ourselves

If we've swallowed our angers. If we've tucked away, deep inside of us, those we blame or resent because they've caused us anger.  If we've never looked at these resentments from every side. If we have not taken the time to vent our angers and frustrations... all of these remain inside of us where they will continue to gnaw upon our new found good health. 
It is good to leave all the negatives of Lyme and Coinfections behind. To drag them into our new healthy life will simply sabotage what we want the most.

Some common feelings felt by people infected with the bacteria's of Lyme Disease and Co-Infections:

We may feel puzzled over the the many and weird symptoms and the downward change in our health. We may feel disturbed, concerned, afraid, anxious, worried, hopeful, disappointed, shamed, embarrassed, flabbergasted, mad, frustrated, distressed, confused, intimidated, guilty, rejected, incompetent, insulted, ashamed,  insecure,  invalidated,  abandoned, controlled, not considered, let down,  enraged, exasperated, hopeless, insecure,  helpless,  optimistic, miserable, responsible, devastated, stifled, depressed, furious, idiotic, not in control, helpless, sad, unloved, alone, powerless, overwhelmed ... 
 

Are you now and have you felt any of these while in Lyme dis'ease? Take the time to to remember when that was and the reason for it?
Feelings alert us through our senses, emotions, intuition and by physical expressions and actions. Feelings alert us to something that is active in our inner or outer environment. Feeling's want us to pay attention, to alert us to do something, take action... That's their job and they will not stop waving their alert flag until we acknowledge them and respond to what they are alerting us to.

Our feelings belong to us alone, nobody makes us feel. Feelings are part of our natural resources within us. Feelings help us feel our lives in four dimensions. They help us to make decisions on how and where to navigate our everyday lives. They help us make changes to better our environment....But... that is only if we own them, listen to what they are alerting us to, and think about what, if any, action to take to make our inner or outer environments harmonious again.

A feeling can nag at us for many years until we finally feel it and acknowledge it and take "action" to make our lives better. That constant, endless nagging of certain feelings can be quite energy draining and often cause us unhappiness.

Life would be very flat and unsafe if we did not have feelings. For example, when we encounter failing health it certainly does not stir up our joyful feelings, rather it stirs up the more difficult feelings.

 
This is anger

"I've had it.” “I am annoyed.” “I am irritated.” “You make me laugh.” “I'm ready to explode.” “I am fed up.” "I'm pissed, but not angry." “I'm annoyed, but certainly not really angry.” Slamming doors, Sarcasm, pounding the table, kicking the chair . . . Trying to bury it by saying, “I am disappointed.” Acting self-sacrificing and long-suffering, to cover up my anger. Trying to act understandingly of the person whose behavior negatively affected my feelings. Passive anger being expressed by manipulating the other into feeling bad. This is all toned down and denied anger.  Anything that causes you feelings of some kind of pain, fear, and powerlessness is anger.

Often, when we are dealing with unknown or known disease, trying to get a diagnosis, loss of health, lack of money, unable to maintain our friendships and socialization, experiencing physical pain, being under severe stress, trying to survive, trying to juggle our lives, trying to keep up our responsibilities, trying to parent, not being up to par in what we do now as to compare to our former self, and all that, it is natural that it will create anger n us. 

Anger is the e-motion that give us the fuel for creating change, or to stand up for ourselves or to spill out what's been irritating us, thus giving others the information they require to change what has been irritating our feelings.

The anger e-motion can only be created by our very own feelings by a combination of some kind of fear, pain and powerlessness. 

 Fear  + Pain + + Powerlessness
 = ANGER
frustration
afraid
guilt 
paranoid
Intimidated
insecure 
terrified 
uneasy 
frustration
terrified
invalidated 
abandoned
distressed 
embarrassed 
hurt 
left out
lonely 
neglected 
not being considered 
rejected 
Being controlled 
helpless 
hopeless 
incapable 
incapacitated 
incompetent 
shame 
unable 
useless 
Anything not in ones control 
The emotion of anger is good because it helps us to make our inner and outer environment(s) better, that's if we choose to take responsibility of it. Anger helps us to let-go and to detach from our losses and disappointments. It helps us to change our ways or to ask others to change something that is making our lives miserable. 

Anger certainly makes us aware of what is important to us.
We don't get angry over things that are not important to us. Anger warns us that something is not okay and that we must speak up for our own good. It gives us the motivation and the energy to create change. It helps us spill out all the feelings and thoughts we've been swallowing (sometimes for decades). 

Anger is for our good when we use it correctly. Anger can also be destructive when we allow it to run wild and express it aggressively.

Anger e-motion naturally releases cortisols, adrenalins, progesterone throughout the body and when these are not vented, they remain in the body where they gnaw away at our health in a very negative way. There is not one Lyme infected person who needs this added to their already difficult load. 

New and old angers can be vented, dealt with, and dissipated. Any swallowed angers can be worked out. All resentments can be vaporized. We simply make time for relieving ourselves of all these angers that have remained to chew on our liver. 

We identify each of our feelings underneath each of our angers and then learn what each of these feelings are wanting from us to make our inner or outer environment comfortable again. It also tells us something about ourselves..what is important to us.

We can release all our resentments. We can do it with the help of experts who specialize in anger release or we can do it ourselves by using such tools as  this formula


On Forgiveness

Forgiveness is to heal you, not the other person.
Forgiveness sets us free, from being controlled by the control we had given to the one
who injured us.
Forgiveness is not the condoning of a harmful behavior, nor excusing or overlooking 
the wrong.

Forgiveness is for giving to you a gift of freedom from the past.
Forgiveness is not something you do, but something you undo.
Forgiveness sets you free from  the injury, the hurt, the hate and the resentment
caused by words, actions, withholds, etc.

Forgiveness changes us from being a prisoner of our past, to peace with our present
memories.
Forgiveness evaporates a resentment and lifts anxiety and depression.
Forgiveness is not denying there was a wrong.

Forgiveness sets us free of our anger toward the one whose behavior caused us
resentment.
Forgiveness expels a clump of negative energy within us, and clears the way for
something new and better to enter us.
Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength and a heroic virtue.

Forgiveness is not swallowing your feelings, but rather bringing them out into the
light so they can help you decide what work you need to do, to make your life better.
Forgiveness is not surrendering - It is a conscious choice.
Forgiveness is not buying someone a present and giving it in front of other's, so
other's will think good of you.

Forgiveness is not pretending some past behavior or injustice holds no negative
energy for you ... when is does.
Forgiveness is not saying, "My Higher Power will take care of it and forgive me for
not doing the work of  forgiving."
Forgiveness is not wearing a big smiley face while at the same time you are beaming
all kinds of negative energy on whatever and whoever has done you wrong.

Forgiveness is not the hollow words, "I'm sorry."
Forgiveness is not the hollow words, "I apologize."
Forgiveness is internal recycling work.

Forgiveness is a healing that always follows a sincere forgiveness.
Forgiveness comes from the work you do within to genuinely and sincerely let-go of
the hurt and than recycling it through the heart and having it come out as genuine
love . . .  for you, for  another or for both of you.

A formula to get rid of Lingering Angers
Start by making a list of all your angers/resentments/irritations/bitters/frustrations...

1. Take one of these from the list.

2. Describe the situation that caused you anger? 

3. How did this affect you at that time and over time? 

Did it affect your self-esteem, your personal relationships, your sexuality, your aspirations and dreams, your feeling of security, your finances? ....

4. What were the underlying feelings of your anger at the time? (Pain, Powerlessness, Fear)

5. In that situation were you being: Being abusive? Selfish? Dishonest? 
Were you trying to make your self look good? 
Were you inconsiderate?

6. Were you responsible for causing that incident? 
Were you to blame in that situation?

7. If yes - How were you at fault?

8. At the time of this incident, look at what your feelings were trying to alert you to. Try to identify what they were wanting you to do?

9. With the information, strengths, weaknesses and smarts you had, at that time in your life, could you have done anything differently?

10. If you encountered that same exact situation again today - Knowing what you know now, how would do things differently?

11. Is there anything you could do now to make the past situation right? If so, brainstorm and do ACTION.  e.g. Do I need to apoplogize for my part in this? Repay something? If so, do it. This is about you and your responsibilities only.

12. When the other was at fault . . .   It was none of your business to carry this around with you. The blame and shame belonged to them and them alone! Yet, you allowed someone else's behavior to cause havoc within you. You are the one who has secretly suffered over the days, months or years. The key word is  . . .  You have allowed it to hurt you.

13. Forgive yourself or forgive them (or both) by writing down, "I did the best I could with the skills and information and smarts that I had at that moment in time.”

or

“They did the best they could with what they had at that moment in time.”  “I do not forgive the inappropriate behavior, but I do forgive (name)_________ for doing the best that She/ He/They could with the information or smarts they had at that  moment in time.
 


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